Same Job, Different Time and Place [R-18] - Part 4

Alfred just let out a frustrated sigh.

"What makes you think I can sleep also? You know that this doesn't affect you but to also those close to you!"

He clutched his fist.

"With this..." He went quiet for a moment. "I don't think I can even trust you to be on your own for five minutes! I thought I could but you blew that to hell!"

That made Arthur get to his feet, though he had to use the wall to support himself.

“Like you just said, Alfred, I am not a bloody child. I don’t need you to look after me! It’s not as fucking easy as you seem to think it is! I have an addiction and no matter how much you watch me, I’m still going to want it! You didn’t do a good enough job of getting rid of it all, so of course I’d be tempted!”

Alfred scowled at that and he tried his best not to lash out at anything nearby him. He wanted to keep his cool but it was so hard.

"I'm fucking trying though, Arthur! I know it's not easy with an addiction but god dammit! It's not easy for me either! I don't know where you hid everything!"

He turned away, refusing to look at the man. A part of him wanted a break but he couldn't leave Arthur like this.

"And obviously you can't handle being alone without being tempted! What the hell were you saying about needing my love and support? I'm trying my best, Arthur! I am!"

“I need you to be understanding, not an arsehole! I know it’s not easy for you either! Why the hell do you think Francis left me?! I’ve been here before. Can’t you see that I’m terrified that I’ll lose you?” Arthur balled his fists, also starting to feel aggressive, thanks to the cocaine.

“If I tell you where it all is, then I’ll just be reminded of places you might have missed.” His head was starting to ache. He stormed off to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water (how very rock and roll, he thought cynically).

Alfred felt his heart drop at that and he went quiet. He knew that it was always somewhat of a fear for Arthur but hearing it just made it ache that more. But he was still angry. Still angry at Arthur's attitude and the betrayal of trust.

Everything ached but he quickly turned away.

"Maybe you would be better off without me being a constant pain in your ass then. It was my fault that you started this in the first place and that it got worse!" He felt himself choke up but he tried to keep strong.

He soon hurried back into the bedroom, feeling the shame well up within him.

Arthur froze at that. He’d never driven Alfred to talk like that before. Wow. That hurt. But he’d hurt him, too. Out of impulse, he threw the glass in his hand on the floor, just wanting to break something. He watched it smash on the floor and grunted in frustration. He supported his weight on the kitchen counter beside him, realising that he had trapped himself in the kitchen. He could try and tidy up, he supposed but it probably wasn’t the safest of – oh, who gave a fuck about safety?

“Fuck you, too!”

Arthur got on to his knees to start picking up shards of glass, not caring as he felt some shards digging into his palms and cutting in the skin.

Alfred closed his eyes and tried to calm himself but it was just so damned hard when he was this tense. How could they get through this when it has only been one day?

Burying his face into his hands, he flinched as he heard the glass shatter.

"Dammit...god dammit! Arthur you asshole..." He muttered under his breath. "Alfred...you're such a fucking dumb ass! Fucking...asshole...!"

He curled up on himself on the bed, feeling too stubborn to actually go out and help Arthur.

Arthur eventually managed to get most of the glass, though some of it was a little hazy. He bagged it in a plastic bag and left it on the side to deal with in the morning. He began to make his way back into the main room, only to slip on the water that had been in the glass when he threw it. He landed on his rump with a curse word but easily picked himself up, stumbling across to the sofa. He was so awake and he and Alfred were fighting now, because apparently that was a thing. Arthur’s mind was too foggy to really be able to comprehend it.

He started humming Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds, what he had sung a few minutes before and lay back on the sofa, just feeling high as a kite (but not euphoric as he might have liked). Actually, he kind of felt like shit. One of his hands was really aching and he raised it so he could take a better look. He was bleeding? Blood? Why was he…? Oh, the glass. How had he forgotten that, it’d only been a sodding minute?

He went to retrieve something to bandage his hand, still humming the Beatles’ song.

Alfred just sighed and he closed his eyes. He couldn't stand it. He had to be the adult here.

Soon enough, though hesitantly, he stepped out of the bedroom. Seeing that Arthur wasn't in the main room, he soon headed towards the kitchen where he heard the glass come from.

That's where he saw Arthur with his bleeding hand. Frowning at the sight of it, he soon reached over to grab the bandages.

"...Let me take care of that. You probably can't do anything for yourself in that state."

He soon reached to grab Arthur's hand so he could at least try bandaging it up.

Arthur snatched his hand away from Alfred. He hadn’t noticed the other come into the room and it had given him a nasty shock. He scowled at Alfred.

“Give me the bandages,” he demanded sternly. “I’m an adult. I can do it.” He held his bleeding hand close but outstretched the other.

Alfred just sighed and he narrowed his eyes.

"I'm just trying to help you!" He soon reached to grab Arthur's bleeding hand (though by the wrist). "Let me at least do this!"

He winced as he saw the bleeding hand and he reached to unravel the bandages.

“Alfred, I said let me go!” Arthur raised his voice, warning him as he started to struggle in his grip. They both knew Alfred was stronger, but he wasn’t going to let Alfred hold on to him like this. Fuck, it reminded him of how his grandfather had grabbed his wrist before dragging him into the study to beat him. It only made Arthur struggle more.

“I can do it. Let me go! I told you to let me go!” He suddenly lurched forwards, trying to push Alfred away with both hands.

Alfred stumbled back as he was pushed away and he stared at Arthur with shock. Did he really push him?

He was just trying to help!

He soon found himself pushing Arthur right back though not hard, growling a bit. He couldn't help himself. He was tired, angry at the situation and not thinking clearly.

"What the hell was that for!? I'm just trying to be the adult here and help you! I just wanted to give you the love and support you wanted!"

"

Arthur immediately built up a defence, feeling panicked by the situation in the state he was in. He stumbled back, beginning to look a little afraid though he quickly regained himself and shoved Alfred right back (again).

“I told you to get off of me! Don’t fucking push me! I’m not afraid of you!”

Alfred found himself stumbling back into the kitchen table and he quickly tried to get his ground back though the small of his back was beginning to ache now.

"You didn't need to fucking shove me in the first place!" He growled out. "You're the one making this fucking ass backwards!"

He soon took a few steps forward so he could press Arthur against the kitchen counter.

"Calm down!"

Arthur looked like he was about to make a run for it but Alfred pushed him back against the kitchen counter, which made Arthur struggle again. He could feel his heart racing in his chest. He didn’t like this situation at all.

“Don’t tell me to calm down! You’re the one trapping me!” his hips were pinned against the kitchen counter and it was very obvious very quickly that Arthur was not okay with it. He tried to push at Alfred’s shoulders but now Alfred was more grounded, he was harder to move. He did try though.

He smacked and delivered a few (light) blows to Alfred’s chest, but he seemed to give up a little as it became futile, hands going to Alfred’s biceps to maybe push him off that way.

“Alfred, let me go. Please. Please let me go. You’re hurting me.”

Alfred froze when he heard that he was hurting Arthur and he quickly pulled away, his eyes wide. He quickly looked down at their engagement rings on their fingers and he winced.

He didn't even deserve to wear it anymore.

"...S...Sorry," He murmured, still a bit in shock.

"I didn't mean to...I just wanted all of this to stop." He reached up to rub at his eyes with his arm though he refused to cry right now.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you."

Arthur frowned at Alfred, feeling his heart rate beginning to return to normalcy, or near enough whilst on cocaine – he was starting to come down now, and it felt awful. It was as though he suddenly aware of the blood that he had put across Alfred’s chest and arms, and hands. He was breathless for a moment, calming down after that struggle between them.

His gaze softened out somewhat as he saw Alfred’s eyes starting to water; he was reminded of a child. His breathing was still heavier than normal. He pursed his lips, beginning to feel stupid.

“I’ve already hurt you… it’s alright. I… forgot myself.”

Alfred just nodded and he continued on rubbing his eyes, still not looking up at Arthur.

"I didn't mean to hurt you. I swear. I love you so much, Arthur. Just this whole thing... I don't know what to do. I've never dealt with this. You're right. I don't know anything about your situation or how hard it is for you and I don't know how to help."

He swallowed thickly, soon managing to pull his arm away though he kept his gaze down.

"Please come back to bed with me."

Arthur was oddly quiet, brow furrowing even further before he sighed a little. What was he doing? He couldn’t treat Alfred like this. This wasn’t right.

“I love you too,” he replied, voice cracking. He did something that surprised even him and pulled Alfred into a hug, still sort of foggy on everything that had happened because it had all happened so fast but he knew that he’d been in the wrong but here Alfred was crying about it. This had to stop.

He held Alfred tightly in his grip, cradling him in a way that wasn’t all that different to how a parent would hold a child. Alfred was so young and here he was, having to pretend he was a grown up.

“Don’t cry, poppet… don’t cry.”

Alfred just nodded and he cuddled up against Arthur, not wanting to move now that he could feel his lover's warmth against him. He didn't say anything, instead just nuzzling closer to the other man.

He still regretted everything but now at least Arthur was being comforting and more like the man that he fell in love with.

Alfred soon wrapped his arms around the other's waist, just letting out a shuddered sigh. He was starting to get tired though and he just wanted to cuddle with Arthur in bed.

Arthur tried to console him with soft words, reminding him that he loved him and just how beautiful Arthur thought that Alfred was, how it wasn’t fitting for someone so lovely to cry. He held him still in his arms for a few minutes, wordlessly reflecting on his actions as he came down, feeling more and more tired.

“We need to clean up before we get into bed again,” he was quiet, putting on the mask he used to when they first met so that Alfred wouldn’t be able to detect anything about what he was thinking, as Arthur wanted to keep that private for now.

“Come on… bring the bandages,” he sighed, slowly releasing Alfred.

Alfred was finally starting to calm down, thankfully, and he just cuddled more against Arthur as he listened to his loving words.

Though soon they had to pull away and he looked up at his fiancé before nodding in agreement.

Grabbing the bandages, he handed them over to the older man. He couldn't help but look down at the hand sadly and he just sighed at the thought that Arthur got hurt. He soon went over to the sink so he could at least wash off the blood.

Arthur waited for an opportunity before sticking his hand beneath the tap for a few moments to clean the blood from around the wound. He then moved out of the way to bandage himself up, struggling to do so with one hand. Eventually, he was able to tie it off and hoped for the best. He then grabbed a paper towel and wetted it, trying to get rid of the small traces of blood on Alfred’s back. His blood. It was weird.

Alfred gave Arthur a grateful smile as he wiped off his back and he finally was able to fully calm down now.

He knew that there was definitely going to be future problems especially concerning this drug addiction but at the same time...he was glad they were at least able to get over this. It had been an extremely nasty fight and brought out something terrible in the both of them.

"Let's get some sleep now...I'm exhausted," He admitted somewhat sheepishly.